Former Chaser boys Andrew Hansen and Chris Taylor have teamed up with triple j comedy producer Craig Schuftan to bring you The Blow Parade, a parody of the music industry, music journalism and “golden-oldie” radio shows. According to Hansen, the show is “a sort of naff, rather sad little radio show that’s hosted by a washed-up has-been British radio presenter named Captain Blow. Each week, he presents one year from the history of classic pop and looks at a specific band.” Yep, The Blow Parade is like listening to your grandfather in the retirement home — it’s hilarious,and you may even learn something (although, in this case, not exclusively about fighting Nazis).

G’day guys. If Patch Adams is to be believed, comedy can heal people. But the only other person we’ve heard of who can heal people without operating is Jesus. So which one of you is Jesus?
Andrew: Well, it’d have to be Craig, wouldn’t it? The man has Christ written all over him.
Chris: Plus, he’s Jewish.
Andrew: Surely he’s overdue for crucifixion, then?

It’s interesting you say that because, looking at the online photos of the three of you, with that moustache and curly hair, Craig’s the one who most resembles Satan.
Andrew: Yes, and he has the deep voice for it, as well.
Chris: Would it be a conflict of interest to be both Satan and Jesus?
Andrew: Well, I think in today’s post-modern world of spin, you could definitely do both.

Agreed.
Craig: I do like the thought that comedy has the ability to heal people, though. Not that I’ve ever seen Patch Adams but…
Chris: See, I disagree. I have seen Patch Adams and he’s a clown. And I was terrified of clowns growing up, and I am still not a big fan.
Andrew: Yeah, the last thing you really want is a clown straight out of a Stephen King novel visiting you in hospital.

Surely if you’re a child reading Stephen King in hospital, a clown really isn’t your biggest worry?
Chris: I’ve always wanted to do a sketch where we explore other uses for clowns. I mean, they make people feel more at ease, right? So why can’t a judge in a big case be dressed as a clown to make everyone relaxed? Or, instead of a firing squad being soldiers, they could be clowns.
Andrew: Umm, we did do that sketch and I think it got consigned to the scary world of DVD extras and YouTube.

No-one has any picture messages of you guys in the shower on their phones. Are you not sleeping with AFL footballers?
Andrew: Oh, I’m sleeping with a lot of footballers.

That explains it, because you look quite clean...
Chris: Ha ha! He does look a bit Queen, doesn’t he?
Craig: He said “clean”...

Moving on, things never seem to work out for child stars — so, was it a conscious decision to not be successful early on in your careers?
Andrew: Definitely. In fact, I think we peaked too early. I wish we were geriatric stars.
Chris: Yes, like that guy from Kill Bill.
David Carradine? Er, he’s dead...
Craig: That’s the one. He was only famous after he turned 900.
Chris: I still think there’s a great market for geriatric centrefolds, too.
Craig: ZOO’s very ageist that way.

But we have “Australia’s Hottest Grandmother” at the moment…
Andrew: I would hypothesise that you could find some 28-year-old grandmothers if you went to the right place, so that’s not a valid argument. We want some real geriatrics, ZOO!

Scary. The monorail system in Sydney is an epic failure — could the monorail song from The Simpsons revive some faith in the system?
Andrew: No.
Chris: This may seem a little left-field, but I would actually go on a monorail if it had a random track setting where there was a chance you might actually collide with another monorail.
Andrew: Like an everyday commuter’s Russian roulette?

Speaking of which, have you guys ventured into the wicked world of Chatroulette yet?
Craig: Hey, and speaking of segues…
Chris: I don’t have a big enough d*ck yet, but if these pills I got off the internet are any use, I should be four inches longer in four short weeks.
Still, the concept of being naked on Chatroulette still confuses me — I always thought the great pleasure of masturbation was that it was private. It’s great, though, because there are no longer flashers at the park — it’s now safe to take children out to the park because all the perverts are hanging around on Chatroulette.
Andrew: That’s just lazy on the part
of the flashers, then.


Is it true that Andrew is the only one who has any real talent?
Andrew: Yes.
Chris: Ha ha! No, really, it’s true.

What about people who only write jokes into their songs ’cos it’s the only way people will listen to them?
Andrew: Ha ha! Yes, oh God, yes! It’s the only reason I turned to comedy — I can guarantee you nobody listened to my music before it became funny.

Did the ABC encourage you guys to do the program over the radio so it was cheaper?
Andrew: No, it was always conceived as a radio show and pitched as such. We have the characters performing a rooftop concert on the Chrysler Building in New York. Not only would that be physically impossible on TV, it’d be really expensive as well!

Are all music journalists pompous?
Chris: Yes. It’s almost like they all try and out hip each other to see who can discover a band first. Also, music’s a very hard thing to write about. That’s why they’re so susceptible to falling back on clichés.
Andrew: Even better is when journos play the reference game.
Craig: What’s that?
Andrew: Glad you asked. It’s where journos describe someone as “Elvis Costello meets John Stephens” just to show off their depth of knowledge in every facet of music. I love it.

The format of The Blow Parade is something quite new to Australia.
Craig: I’m pretty confident that people will enjoy it. I’ve been working at triple j for a while but this is the first time where people can sit down and listen to the radio like it’s a TV show.
Chris: Yeah, er, just like in 1955!

Catch The Blow Parade on Triple J, Wednesdays at 5pm
Podcasts are available at www.abc.net.au/triplej/blowparade.


So let have you heard the new venture by The Chaser boys yet, comment below and let us know what you think.

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