“I care more about what’s inside a person
Even if this is true, it’s a lie on the first date. Let’s be honest here: first dates are not about getting to know someone, or making a connection, or finding out “what’s inside a person”. They’re all about snap judgements, surface impressions and crippling rejection. Pretending otherwise makes you look like an insincere douche. So just ogle her in a gentlemanly fashion and tell her she looks fantastic — whether it’s true or not.

2)
“No, I’ve never  been married”
This is a rookie mistake, and if “I’ve never been married” is a lie, you’re clearly not a rookie. If the lie works, and she wants to see more of you, don’t you think there’s a point where you’ll have to explain the pale band on your third finger and those three children following you around every second weekend? Wise up, man.

3)
“I love blondes/Asians/amputees”
There are compliments and there are compliments, so keep it vague unless you want to look like some kind of creepy doll collector.

4)
“Of course I have a loaded gun”
Don’t say it if it’s a lie. Don’t say it if it’s true. Don’t say it, period.

5)
“You bet! I’d love to come with you!”
Even if you’re really into her, there are some things no man should sit through. These include ballet, great aunts’ birthdays, drinks-with-the-girls and any film in which Jennifer Aniston appears fully clothed. So don’t put yourself through it. Ask for the date, pretend that you have something on, and arrange to meet for a steak and hotel quickie the next day. Trust us, your self-respect will thank you for not telling this pork pie.


6)
“Sure, I know about wine”
If you don’t know, don’t pretend. It’s better to appear ignorant than pretentious,insecure and ignorant.

7)
“Dont worry, babe. I’ve had a vasectomy”
If things go well enough for you to tell this lie, you’re doing okay. But still don’t tell it. Child support sucks..

8)
“I’d like the steak tartare”
Nobody likes steak tartare. We cook cows for a reason.

9)
“I’m completely over my erectile dysfunction”
The same advice for lie No. 4 applies here: Don’t say it if it’s a lie. Don’t say it if it’s true. Don’t say it, period.

10)
“I don’t have a criminal record... in this state”
Lies with qualifiers always sound suspect, so leave them off if you can help it.